OK, it's my bad and it's my fault for abandoning you for the past 1 month but I was busy hence limited/ allowed myself to use the computer only during the weekends.
There are quite a few issues that I would like to blog about. Don't say I didn't pre-warn you (any readers left? LOL) that it'll be a LONG post.
***
Community Medicine week is over and MSK (musculoskeletal) system has started. It's interesting as we need to learn about the bones and parts of it. Spending time with Bobby was fun and it was better when he allowed me to touch him =P I'll post his picture up when I have the free time.
As I enter the second week of MSK, I'm starting to feel burned out. Sleeping less than 6 hours and trying to stay awake in the afternoon is just testing my mental power. Every time I enter the train (KTM), even though I am standing I can actually fall asleep and I nearly fell a few times. Ballet is also taking up quite a lot of my time and energy. I sometimes kinda dread going for class BUT recently I found out that it can be a place to release all the pent out stress especially when frog is around =)
***
For PMS (partner medical school) students, we were required to write a narrative entitled
"Your future plans and general career aspirations after graduation from PMS/IMU Clinical School (typewritten, not exceeding 250 words and in Font 12)". So after getting less sleep and more tired that usual, I managed to produce a not-too-bad narrative.
Now the issue I would like to address here is how some people would only approach you when they need help. So on the day we have to submit our narratives, there were some who have not talked/ approached me for some time appeared and asked for my help. I honestly didn't mind but after helping them, only did this thought sunk in "why ask me and not your other closer friends?" When I told my mother about it, she was a little unhappy that I offered to help because this narrative is quite important as (apparently) the PMS choose/consider us based on our narrative (besides our results). Quote her
:
"this is a competition, everyone should do it by themselves so that it's fair."
BUT there were some who had their family members writing the essay for them so is this still call fair?
***
Last month, I joined the Eco Friends Club because I thought the club needed people since one of IMU's policy in forming club is that there must be at least 20 members to start off. Besides, the founders are Jo Yee (a HELP friend) and another batch mate. Innocently I went there to increase the number of members but end up being in the committee board. I am willing to help out and commit myself BUT there were so many meetings and most of the time, I'll be sitting there quietly listening to the founders and the teacher-in-charge discussing about certain issues. The feeling I had was "
I could have used this time to study."
Point to note- our club is not official yet- hence most of the time in the first few meetings were discussions on how to persuade the lady in charge of clubs to make us official. HOWEVER, I am glad that FINALLY we have something that I can help out!! The Student Representative Council is organising the Earth Day and they wanted us to help out in handling the poster competition. Yeah, at least in the meetings I can contribute a bit and not waste time =)
***
Recently or I should say this year onwards, I have been feeling very annoyed with my family members. Everything they did just irritate me and make me feel angry (for no reason!!). I feel bad but after a while I would justify my feelings and the guilt just evaporated. This week, I have not had dinner with my family as I buy my own dinner and eat while study in my room while they go out for their dinner. Reasons for my actions are:
1. We have to wait for my mother and brother to come home from work and they usually reach home by 8ish and by time we go out for dinner, it would be 9ish
2. I wake up VERY early hence I got to sleep earlier but late dinner is just making me fat and unhealthy!!
3. If I have my dinner at home, I only need maximum 15 minutes while I'll waste almost 1.30hours if I join them for dinner
4. If I spend more time with them, I'll feel more irritated and annoyed =P
There you go, my valid reasons!! I sometimes just can't wait to fly away...
***
Yesterday, my sem3 juniors asked me to help them at the CSU (clinical skills unit) and I gladly went and help since I understand what they are going through. I am happy that I actually took the initiative to teach them what I know because besides refreshing my memories (sem5's OSCE exam also include sem3's stuff), I got a SP for my future practices!! Yeah!!
In addition, I got praises from the juniors which helped me a little in my inferiority complex which I have been experiencing since I came to IMU. I always felt that everyone around me are so smart and I will be expelled anytime soon since I am not as good as them. I confess that this is one of the motivation that keep me studying all the time. I know feeling this way is bad and maybe I am not as bad as I think I am but I actually feel it deep down that I am a no good. Reaching sem5 is honestly a huge surprise for me but standing in front of me is another hurdle that I got to leap. I must pass sem5 and I will try to do it without putting so much stress on myself (which was what happened in sem3 and hence that result).
Pray for me people...
Hopefully I'll resume blogging by next week =)
Til then, take care people...
My favourite study place- the aquarium =)
